Editor’s Note: Latest research shows that nearly 1000 Pakistani women and girls are murdered every year for allegedly defaming their family’s honor. The statistics highlight the growing scale of violence suffered by many women in Pakistan. Despite progress on better protecting women’s rights, activists say the government needs to do more to prosecute murderers in cases largely dismissed by police as private, family affairs. What hurts the most is that some victims were raped or gang raped before being killed, according to Human Rights Commission of Pakistanannual  report. Who killed them? The answer might be more shocking because most of the women were killed by their brothers and husbands. Only 20% of the victims were provided medical aid before they died. We women don’t deserve this treatment from the men, who came in this world through a woman. The reason for highlighting this issue is not to bring disgrace to Pakistan but to educate the youth and bring awareness of this illegal tradition internationally. “According to Navi Pillay, the United Nations high commissioner for human rights, there are 5,000 instances annually when women and girls are shot, stoned, burned, buried alive, strangled, smothered and knifed to death by fathers, brothers, sons, uncles, even mothers in the name of preserving family “honor.” Ms. Pillay has rejected arguments that such family violence is outside the conceptual framework of international human rights.” (NYT 2010)

This blog is written by our guest writer and its based on a true story and every emotion portrayed in it are true and full of pain. I personally believe there is no honor in honor killing its only HORROR, the horror of being killed, the horror of defaming your family name, the horror of not being accepted by the society and the horror of being a human being just for once.

I am Bano. My mother used to call me Pari (Fairy). I was the only baby girl of my parents. I was killed by my uncle. My father was supposed to kill me but he didn’t have the courage, so he asked my uncle for the favor. I was killed in the honor of my family’s good name which I destroyed. My grave is in my village, I was killed on Eid day (means “Feast” and refers to the occasion itself), and I was buried in my Eid dress. My father visits my grave in dark so that no one sees him. My mother she never visits my grave, she can’t make it.

My life in the world was not so good. The style of parenting I received made me a girl with low self-esteem. I was never a strong and confident person. My father’s lack of contributions and engagement in my life made me find alternate ways to relate to men. There was a void in my life, to fill that void I made wrong choice.

The only charming days were of 30 days when I had someone in my life. He used to stand in front of my school. One day he sent a cell phone through my friend. First ever gift in my life. Daily we had conversations whenever I found suitable time to talk. He promised to provide every joy of life that I was missing at my parent’s home. We never met but those snatched conversations brought new charm in my life. I considered myself one of the luckiest persons in surrounding. But turns out, that boy was a cheat. For him I was nothing but a chance to win a bet. He had bet with his friends that he will win my trust in a month. But it took him only two weeks. He celebrated that day in a restaurant where his friends enjoyed our phone call conversation which was much longer than usual timings. In that evening my father heard our conversation and I knew that he will kill me. So I left home for someone I thought will protect me, but he never showed up. My family had to kill me for this immoral act. They were supposed to kill us, but he was noting just a wrong number.

For me he was my soul mate and we are made for each other. I had blind trust and felt secure with. For him I was a just an opportunity to have fun time, a chance to win a bet. This bet turned very expensive, it did cost a life of a human being.

Bano: Father, you could have saved me.

Father: Yes may be, but I could not absorb the immense pressure of our society. I followed my tradition to save future. You brought shame and disgrace to our family. I had to sacrifice you to purify my reputation.

Father: I worked hard day and night to feed you and your siblings to give you basic necessities of life. In return you destroyed my name in society.  You left home for a person who didn’t love you at all, for whom you were just a piece for fun. Who used you and threw you. We live in a society where we can die for our due honor, you just ignored this.

Bano: It was my first youthful infatuation with wrong person. I regret it, but I am innocent, it’s just that I could not distinguish the right and wrong. I had blind trust, which I should not. My love was reciprocated. He used to compliment my beauty and for a girl of my age, I thought this is true love. I was just 17. You never talked about this, neither mother. You just sent me to school, never asked what’s going on there. Your lack of interest and affection made me feel that I am not worthy.   

Bano: How did my death save the future?

Father: Well to teach other youth a lesson that consequence of such immoral act is death.

Bano: Did this “honor killing” helped youth?

Father: No, it didn’t. Your murder was not the last one. Love marriages and such immoral acts are still there with increased ratio. Practice of “honor killing” is growing. 

Bano: Father! Are we more religious or traditional?

Father: [he keeps silent for a while and replied] we are more traditional than religious.

Bano: Yes that’s what I thought; I wish we were more religious; this would have never happened in its first place. Our religion considers me as human, who got emotions, feelings just like man. You just did care of food, home, this was never enough. My emotional, physical and psychological needs were ignored by you. In our religion man and woman are equal, but in our tradition most of the time I am only one who carries the burden of “family honor”

Father: I wish I could undo things.

Bano: Life doesn’t give second chance; we were supposed to be responsible. I would die 100 times for your honor, only if it really brings your honor back, but it doesn’t. I would forgive my killers, if this murder brings any positive impact in society but it won’t. Society is responsible for my immoral act; you are responsible of this disgrace; I was not the only guilty here.

I am Bano and my mother used to call me Pari, and this is conversation that we do when my father visits my grave, he still visits me in dark so that no one sees him.

Rahila Umer Sumalani

The guest writer was a Fulbright scholar in Fall 2009. Currently she is working as Assistant professor in Baluchistan University of Information Technology, Engineering and Management Science, Quetta. She got her MS degree from The University of Georgia, Athens, USA.

DISCLAIMER: The names and places has been changed to hide the identity of the victims. The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of Illinois Institute of Technology.

Pak Sar’zmin Shaad Baad (Blessed be the sacred land)

Editor’s Note: As the days passes by the situation of Pakistan is getting worse, people are being killed without any reason, the economy is getting worse and people fear everything due to lack of security. It poverty level increased over the past decade, which are now affecting 40 per cent of Pakistan’s population, according to independent research studies. Recent studies shows that they lives below the globally accepted poverty line of $1.25 per day. Pakistan was also ranked 113th among 120 countries regarding literacy rate, which is projected to reach 60 percent till 2015 from the existing 55 percent. But still people choose to live in Pakistan? Why is that? Read our guest writer article to get the answer.

This article doesn’t mean to draw fake lines of rising dawn.  We might be in many blues of current mess but silver linings are always there. The ones who act instead of complaining are the true heroes. Complains and complains, why people complain while living in the same place where they were born. It’s a mob rule dear lady in our country. Mob mentality has gloved our psyche; the very fabric of society suffers at the hands of complexes people. Many Psychologists say if someone speaks too much on something all the time it means deep down in his heart, he himself is guilty of that complex he has which gets expression in his talk. So our nation, our people they are unable to walk the talk with no action.
Those institutions which thrive in our country become a target of iconoclasts who themselves couldn’t achieve success so pull their legs. All this speaks of a vibrant, proud and very much alive nation. What we need is optimism; I would say ask people what they was there in a 16-years-old like Malala, she is  addressing UN, CNN, inaugurating Birmingham library and nominated in Nobel Prize. I want to ask how many girls even in developed world could boast of having a teen like Malala, who achieved phenomenal fame by sheer bravery. You will not find such things in developed countries where all are somewhat well off, they will have less volatile tempers, less hatred therefore peace.

This is one aspect, Pakistan is here to stay and survive, and we have all others could dream of, for example just like Aitizaz Hussian: sacrificed life, achieved martyrdom, he is a hero. While drawing room instinctual and as called brave ones. In people’s opinion it is a terminally sick country where to borrow form Yeats, the best lack all conviction and the worst are full of passionate intensity.
Pakistan a Muslim republic that occupies the heartland of ancient South Asian Civilization in the Indus River valley; formerly part of India; achieved independence from the United Kingdom in 1947. Where we have power of minerals, where we have Sindh, Punjab, Baluchistan and KPK.
Take back roads see where it leads but problem is with us that we are not that sincere with our own country and then yet again we blame for no reason. My question is what Pakistan is? It’s just a place where we are living but to make this a heaven it’s our role to play which we are not even concerned about. Pakistan is me and you Pakistan is “us” I’m sorry for this negative message guys, it’s just that on days like today we can’t stand the ignorance of some people. On way to work this to build and become loyal to our own homeland to not to complain more because the reason of complaining legit. However we can’t live with the goofs and house, and we through garbage on roads, it’s your responsibility to pick up off the road an empty packet of juice that you people decided to carelessly throw out the window without a second thought. Not only do we have to put up with the fact we eat  but we also have to deal with the fact that we doesn’t care a damn about our city or motherland that God has so graciously provided for him. If we all treated the streets of Pakistan with as much love as we do our homes and temples, we would have 5 star ratings on cleanliness rather than being known as one of the dirtiest cities in the world.

Pakistan which means the “Land of Pure” and it is not as pure as our founding father Quaid-e-Azam Mohammad Ali Jinnah wanted. Though, we have lost one wing of it as well. But still we want to live in such a land not because we don’t have any other option but with our perception that the things will improve one day. It is that hope which we find among common Pakistani who is ready to sacrifice for their motherland. As they know how one feel on a strange land and without independence. They have the resort of coming back from all kind of crisis. One there is a greater cause you won’t find another nation Like Pakistan when they get united for the sake of their motherland. They cope with one of the worst earthquake hit by northern part and Kashmir with their own resources, the ordinary people from Khyber to Karachi to Gawadar went to the earthquake victim in large number to help them and show their solidarity. In Swat operations in 2009 when millions had to leave were sheltered by ordinary people and given them meals and this kind of passion has rarely seen in the history of world. It is a Nation which has Malala, Aitezaz, Ch.Aslam, Dr. Salam and not to forget Shaheed Benazir and Salman Taseer, who sacrificed their lives for the sake of greater cause and making this country a better place for us. Pakistan will survive all the storms as it has one asset which none other country has. The Pakistanis passion which no one can find anywhere else.  Take a cool and calm view of things don’t let them cause stress. However bitter they may be, they are a part of life and if we take stress, may collapse instead of dealing with them. The path to justice, peace & happiness is long, winding and tiring. Let hope & resolve be your companions all the way. Such a journey may test the moral and emotional mettle to highest & finest limits, but that’s the enjoyable part of it for people of mettle.

 Keep yourself happy, solid and determined for you for this Nation’s unborn future.

Monaiza A Maixza
The guest writer is a freelancer writer in Pakistan, Domain Manager at Label, Contributing editor at Brands Magazine and Owner at B&Maixza. She writes at http://maixza.wordpress.com/ and tweets at Monaiza_Diva.

DISCLAIMER: The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of Illinois Institute of Technology.

In honor of the great man MLK I dream…

I personally believe that every human has a duty, a role and a certain function to perform for humanity, for his country and for his people and I always feel that I am lagging behind to play my due role. This I learnt from my father, who taught me the values of fellowship, humanity and hard work. Because of his teachings, I still believe that if we all play our parts in our own communities, towns, villages and cities, one day we will succeed to make this world a better place to live.

Grooming myself as a scholar and a person

As the New Year progresses, I have grown tremendously, not only as a student but as a human being as well. The Illinois Institute of Technology has continuously opened so many doors as I continue to transition from a 2-year community college to a four year institution. During the past couple of months, I have been exposed to a variety of rigorous courses that have aided me in my quest of one day entering the professional psychology field. Along with the help of some of the best psychology professors that IIT has to offer, I am certain that this goal will soon become a reality.

Throughout the Fall semester 2013, I chose to maintain extra-curricular activities to a minimum; so I could concentrate on my studies. However, I did manage to volunteer and gain self-reassurance as I participated in some of the most memorable experiences. Such was the case of The Bank of America Chicago Marathon which tested my will to encourage thousands of runners from around the world. As a spectator, I cannot imagine the stamina needed to cross the finish line. Nonetheless, I can identify as a student who has the same ambition to accomplish a goal. Additionally, I have contributed by volunteering for IIT’s Boeing Scholars Academy mock-interview for high school seniors. Meeting with these talented individuals has reminded me of the aspirations I once had as a high school student. Today, I see these dreams becoming true, and I am eager to continue working with these bright minds by mentoring them on the road to success.

Now that I am in my second semester at such a prestigious institution, I am confident enough to take on the task of actively participating in various school organizations. I am a visionary, capable of leading, providing comfort to others, and with an immense willingness to learn from the best. Likewise, I have decided to work with those that understand my situation as a transfer student by becoming part of the Transfer Student Organization. I am eager to work with my peers and hopefully devise a plan that will ease the transition from a community college. I am part of a group of dedicated scholars who want to thrive and continue to make The Illinois Institute of Technology stand out amongst the other institutions.

Deysi Paniagua
Junior, Psychology Student

(The writer is a Presidential Scholar and she joined IIT in Fall 2013)

DISCLAIMER: In this blog the writer share her thoughts that what she have leaned from IIT till now.The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of Illinois Institute of Technology.

From Pakistan – America : A journey of learning

It has been quite a while since I am back from America and I already see lots of changes within me not as a journalist only but as person too. Before I went there I used to hear this sentence a lot that America is a land of learning but when I reached there, I truly realized this thing that why do people say this. I am glad that I was among those lucky people who got selected for a 40-days journalism program by USEFP to come here and let myself grow.

The day I landed in USA I kept asking myself a lot of questions regarding this country and people around. When I was walking down the street to buy my some stuff, I kept on asking myself that we have the same road, same trees, we all are under the same sky and we inhale the same air but what’s that make America so different from us? What make it so unique, a must come and learning place for everyone. It took me a while to get answers to these questions but once when I started to socialize I got the answers to my most of question. One of the most important thing that I learned was that here people value the time more than anything and that’s what is making them groom so much. Secondly here people work to learn not to earn (talking about the community services). And thirdly the technology advancement here have made everything very easier for the people.

Few things that really shocked me about American culture were that fruits and vegetables are way more expensive than meat and poultry, which clearly explains why the poor is more obese than the rich and you cannot purchase alcohol unless you are 21 but can purchase a gun if you are 18. Coming from Pakistan, where we just need cash because cards are not accepted at most places, I was really surprised by the cashless system in the US. Every place accepts credit cards. Even at sightseeing place where they had no computers but had some sort of mobile app and a device attached to it which accept credit cards. It was amazing.

One thing that really amused me that here you address your boss by their last name until and unless you are very frank with them and they allow you to address them by their first name with any title. And this applies to pretty much everyone, regardless of how much older they are than you. In my country we would never do this. One of the good thing was that parents can get arrested for physically punishing their children, whereas in my country usually parents are told to punish them so they obey you (only in rural area where parents are not literate). I also got to know that a lot of couples adopt children, sometimes in spite of having their own, and treat them exactly like their own. In spite of the society being openly hedonistic and liberal, the social norms and standards still have very strong conservative religious influences. And the top most important thing that people here are amazingly friendly, hospitable and helpful. Yet, a very conveniently private lifestyle.

Mir Behram Baluch
Editor, Monthly Balucea Pakistan
balucea@hotmail.com
Facebook: Monthly-Balucea-and-Publications

(The guest writer is a journalist in Pakistan and visited United States of America in October 2013, for a 40-days journalism program sponsored by USEFP)

DISCLAIMER: In this blog the writer share his thoughts that what were the cultural difference he found here.The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of Illinois Institute of Technology.

Legend to me

Character of a random face can easily describe with some anonymous view we just need to visualize it.

He who seeks ecstasy in love should not complain of suffering. He is out of suffering having emerged the strongest soul; the most massive characters seared with scars. Similarly you talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts; and when you can no longer dwell in the solitude of your heart you live in your lips, and sound is a diversion and a pastime. And in much of your talking, thinking is half murdered from inside. He is amazing in his own way for there is nothing to fear as long as the creative urge and his charm is still in my life or maybe remain immortal. Resurgence is another reality of what person lies, not what he reveals to you but what he cannot reveal his secret cards. As he doesn’t lie maybe this is something his essence of life. A man with his formed army rules worthy critics of my memories, applause remedy of pride in some hope.

Moreover best quality in him is bearing; he creates a favorable impression in carriage and personal conduct of pain apparently a person like him need a sense of humor, with a thick skin and lots of willpower. If you have these you will fair well. One shouldnot need such crap as patriotism! When you are fighting in a war you are fighting to stay alive and to keep your moral alive for the world. Ask anyone who has actually fought (not the armchair soldiers on here who have never experienced it) and they will tell you the same thing. Calling his name is something new to me that the first touch of dawn melt somewhere in his thoughts. His love crawl in the golden armor where I can sketch him more beautifully more than I can express in words. I can not sketch him into a dark night he is not as cruel and thirsty as the tribal elder says, nor is he shadow of the moon on a peninsula.

Look!

There he comes, carrying a gift for me which I am not allowed to see, like I said he doesn’t show his cards but he can transform someone in something special. Let me sculpt him in sand and put some stones for the sake of my possessiveness, observing for stone cause only stone can makes a durable work of art. But the eye of betrayal, jade of the soul streaked him with grief’s reality.

Long were the days of pain I have spent within its walls, and long were the nights of loneliness; and who can depart from his pain and his loneliness without regret?

I have learned talkative from the silence, intolerant from the toleration, and unkind from the kindness; yet, strange, I am grateful to Him!

I have his charm in my life because He is the one unforgettable Legend to Me, but man sustained by human dignity.

Monaiza A Maixza
The guest writer is a freelancer writer in Pakistan, Domain Manager at Label, Contributing editor at Brands Magazine and Owner at B&Maixza. She writes at http://maixza.wordpress.com/ and tweets at Monaiza_Diva.

(Concept: A person steps into your life, teach you its meaning its value, correct your wrongs and one day disappears. Make you a better person.The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of Illinois Institute of Technology).

DISCLAIMER: This blog was originally published on the writer’s WordPress but we re-posted here with her permission. The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of Illinois Institute of Technology.

Why I chose to be a Presidential Scholar?

Goodness is a measure, which is gauged by the surroundings. To describe myself best I would like to quote a famous quotation, “When going get tough, the tough gets going.” I personally believe that every human has a duty, a role and a certain function to perform for humanity, for his country and for his people and I always feel that I am lagging behind to play my due role. This I learnt from my father, who taught me the values of fellowship, humanity and hard work. Because of his teachings, I still believe that if we all play our parts in our own communities, towns, villages and cities, one day we will succeed to make this world a better place to live.

Despite the fact that, to be able to read and write is considered  a sign of success and prestige in Pakistan but I was not satisfied as I always wished to do something which could have a beneficial and a positive impact on human lives and which could make me internally content.

Though, I belong to one of the remotest part of Pakistan (Baluchistan) but I am still blessed to avail the opportunity to get education. My father actually went against his whole family to educate his daughters, because to him education is the basic necessity. Dreams have no bounds, my parents taught me that, and, that’s what made me dream. I am not an intellectual, but, the famous quote by Martin Luther King Jr. “I have a dream…!” really changed my life.

I have a dream for my village and people that one day they will also get a chance to taste the sweet fruit of education. I have a dream that one day my country literacy rate will be 100 percent. I have a dream that one day my children can proudly say that, “Our mom brought a change,” and I have a belief that one day my all dreams will come true.

I was sure that unless I get a higher degree in communication I will continue work on the execution level and cannot associate myself with the planner of development. So, I have decided to go for this scholarship, I am quite sure that I can cause a pleasant impact on human lives, if not on a larger scale, but surely on a smaller scale which is more than enough for my town and my people. Right now, I don’t have the wisdom, I lack the skill and knowledge, but Illinois Institute of Technology with its environment and course will equip me with all the essentials that will help me to achieve my dreams and to educate my people.

Shireen Gul

In this blog the writer share her thoughts that why she chose to be a presidential scholar.The views expressed by the writer and the reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of Illinois Institute of Technology. 

A dream came true…

Illinois Institute of Technology is a home for many international students. They leave their homes and families, come this far to endeavor the journey of knowledge for a better future.  Thanks to IIT which makes us feel like home. But have we ever thought that there might be many students who want to come here, to attain good education but due to financial strains they can’t make it.

Well, we didn’t but someone else thought about it and made this dream come true for almost 200 transfer students. “Inspired by a series of conversations with Chancellor Cheryl Hyman (IIT, CS 1996) of the City Colleges of Chicago and the presidents of the City Colleges of Chicago, in 2010 Illinois Institute of Technology announced a major new scholarship and educational outreach initiative — the Presidential Scholarship. Through this initiative, IIT is determined to substantially redefine pipeline initiatives in the science, engineering, architecture, technology, business and human science fields. Collaborating institutions and organizations are committed to serve as a catalyst to support students toward their goals to conduct undergraduate research and earn advanced professional and academic degrees. Scholars in turn are asked to significantly engage with their K-12 and community college communities to encourage and empower others towards educational success.”
(http://admissions.iit.edu/undergraduate/finances/presidential-scholarships)

Let’s take a look how this scholarship came in being. It was early 2010, when Cheryl L. Hyman became the Chancellor of City Colleges of Chicago (CCC) and she saw that there are many deserving transfer students, who don’t have enough financial support for universities like IIT.  So, CCC along with IIT wanted to make an award for the transfer students while keeping in mind that the award would be an initiative that includes community outreach especially STEM+ educational outreach.

At the same time Gerald Doyle, Vice Provost, Student Access, Success and Diversity Initiatives connected with Dr. Carl Mack of National Society for Black Engineers (NSBE), who has been visiting Caribbean specially the island of St. Lucia and had found out that some of the most talented students he met belonged to St. Lucia. Therefore, he wanted to make sure that those deserving students should get a good place in a good institute.

Dr. Mack, met Dr. Lydia Pettis Patton (one of the most inspirational person I have come across in my life) in a conference in Toronto and shared his dream and they together with other, made their dream come alive.

The first batch of presidential scholars arrived on campus in fall 2010, which was focused on CCC and St. Lucia and transfer students from City of Chicago (26 students from City of Chicago and 28 from St. Lucia). Later on they expanded their wings and now we have students from Pakistan, Jordan, Malaysia, Syria and many more.

By this spring semester, we will have six batches of presidential scholars and few have graduated as well, who are making difference in their community and that is what presidential award it about, “Doing at least one good thing a year”.

Shireen Gul
The writer is a Presidential Scholar and an international journalist. She joined IIT in Fall 2013 and her major is Professional and Technical Communication.

 

“Your attitude …

“Your attitude determines your success or defeat. If you believe you can attain it, then nothing can stop you.”